Don't Get Personal

Pickle packing millionaire Oscar Whippet is killed when he crashes his new "crash proof" airplane. His eccentric cousin in Iowa, Elmer Whippet, inherits "Whippet's Personality Pickles," much to the chagrin of Whippet's business partner, James M. Snow and advertising executive Jules Kinsey, Snow's brother-in-law. Snow sends Elmer a telegram, offering to buy out the heir for $1,000,000, but Elmer has as little interest in selling the business as he has in running the business. One day, however, he learns that Whippet Pickles sponsors his favorite radio show, "Mary and John," and his curiosity is piqued. As Elmer thinks that "Mary and John" are a real married couple, Snow and Kinsey ask the show's writer, Paul Stevens, for help, as they are afraid that the new heir will cancel the show if he learns that the couple are just actors. Paul suggests that they produce a real-life "Mary and John," and notes that while actor John Stowe is fine for his role, actress Mary Reynolds is anything but the demure character she performs on the radio. Snow and Kinsey decide on the advertising man's secretary, Susan Blair, even though Mary is actually engaged to John, and Paul is engaged to Susan. Elmer arrives in New York and is taken to United Broadcasting by taxi driver Stanislaus Noodnick, whom he refers to as "Charlie." He immediately runs into Mary Reynolds, who tells him that John has left her for another woman. Elmer offers to speak to John, but Mary warns him that John will try to tell him that the other woman is her. She then sends Elmer to Snow's apartment, where John and Susan are setting up house, according to Paul's "script." When Elmer arrives, however, he mistakes Paul for John, then chastises the radio writer for leaving his wife. Meanwhile, after hearing Snow offer Elmer only $50,000 for his share the pickle business, instead of the $1,000,000 stated in the telegram, Charlie threatens to expose the crooked businessman unless he is "cut in." The taxi driver then agrees to get Elmer to sign the $50,000 contract for $5,000. Later, Mary arrives at the Snow apartment, where Paul tells her of Elmer's latest mix-up. Mary then informs him that Elmer knows that Susan is not the real "Mary." Paul and Mary begin arguing, which causes Paul's appendicitis to act up. As he refuses to go to the hospital, she stays with him until the pain subsides, but is then forced to stay the night when "Uncle Elmer" returns and insists that "John and Mary" go to bed together. While Paul and Mary fight, however, John and Susan get acquainted on a nightclub dance floor. Later, Mary becomes upset when she mistakenly thinks that Paul has fallen off the balcony while sleepwalking, and the two come to realize that their constant sparring masks a hidden attraction. Meanwhile, John and Susan are also falling in love while on an outing at the beach. The day of the next "Mary and John" broadcasts arrives, and even though Charlie drives Elmer to the studio via Connecticut, Elmer still manages to arrive at the studio in time to discover who the real "John and Mary" are. When Paul informs Elmer that Snow and Kinsey were trying to cheat him, he fires the two executives, and the two couples finally pair off with their true partners. Elmer then turns to the camera and says, "You knew it was going to end that way, didn't you. That's the way it always does in the movies."