Opening title-card: Men have been rightly called the masters of the world. Men have subdued the wild animals. Men have penetrated deep into the jungle, and have been able to look at the moon and the planets. But there is still one place on Earth where no man has ever set foot nor has been even permitted to glimpse. We open inside a ladies lounge where Jill Baker (Merle Oberon) drinks a full glass of water. Her friends ask her about her problem, which is not clear yet. Jill powders her nose. Margie Stallings (Olive Blakeney) finally convinces her to go see Dr. Vengard (Alan Mowbray). Jill enters Dr. Vengards office, where he takes down her information. She tries to lie about her age, which he sees right and asks again. This age he writes down with a question mark next to it. Jill then claims to not have a problem, to which the Doctor replies that she is just not in-tune with herself. She tells him that her problem comes and goes. He asks What comes and goes? To which she says Hiccups. Dr. Vengard believes the hiccups are caused by a nervous condition, so he wants to run some tests. They step into another room. Time has passed, and Dr. Vengard has questioned Jill about her past, and now begins asking about her marriage and husband. After asking about her sleeping habits and making a comparison to being on a vegetable diet while the person next to you eats a steak, Jill relates this to her husband and starts hiccupping. Margie comes over to Visit Jill. They talk about Dr. Vengard, quickly moving to problems in her marriage. Jill tells Margie of the other morning when she had finally fallen asleep, only to be woken up by a gargle. Larry Baker (Melvyn Douglas) then comes home, exchanges a quick conversation of how are you, and then leaves again. Larry pops his head back in to ask if the Coopers are coming to dinner, so he knows whether to shave or not. This prompts the girls to discuss martial issues again, causing Jill to start hiccupping again. Larry reads the paper in his office. Jill comes in and tells him her hiccups are back. Thinking shes kidding, he pocks her in the stomach teasingly and goes back to the paper. Jill tries to talk to him again, this time Larry tells her about Mr. Kafka (Sig Ruman) coming to dinner next week. He tells her to make it have Hungarian influence for Kafka, and then practices a Hungarian toast. He pokes her in the stomach again. She questions him about it, and asks him not to keek her anymore as she leaves the room. Inter-card: And so the keeks was gone out of another marriage. Jill paces in the bedroom, while Larry sleeps. She climbs into bed and makes a bark like noise. Larry, in a half sleep, gets out of bed and lets the dog outside. She tells him it was her who made the noise. Just then the dog barks outside to which Larry shhs her. Jill enters Dr. Vengards office, who is out, so she waits with another man. He goes back and forth about wanting a cigarette. They begin talking, to which he speaks his mind and is touchy by what she says. He seems to hate everything. He thumbs through a magazine till he comes across an article entitled: The Happy Bakers. He asks her how she is so happy. After seeing she is uncomfortable, he goes to leave. She stops him asking him why he hates a certain painting. He compares it to the her article saying its misrepresentation. Jill and the man enter an art gallery. He finally introduces himself as Alexander Sebastian (Burgess Meredith). They both criticize the pieces of art, until they come across one that is suppose to be a portrait of Sebastian, but is just a bunch of different things. He describes what the different items mean. A line in the paining stands for his inhibition, for which he has gone to see Dr. Vengard about, as a musician he cant play in front of a crowd of people. Inter-card: There was a smell of Goulash at 685 park avenue when Universal Mattress and United Furniture were about to invade the Baker home. The Butler (Richard Carle) and Maid (Mary Currier) place the name cards on the dining table. Larry arrives at home and rushes into the living room, passing by Sebastian on the couch. He enters the bedroom where Jill is putting on makeup. The maid delivers a package to Larry, it is a record: Night in Budapest. Larry walks out into the living and plays the record. After a few seconds he is startled by Sebastian. Larry asks him what he thinks of Universal Mattress and United Furnitures merger, as well as Mr. Kafka. Sebastian, blowing past the questions, puts away a vase he finds ugly and orders scrambled eggs instead of Goulash. Larry returns to the bedroom, where his wife tells him about Sebastian and his piano playing. They begin arguing over the importance of tonights dinner. Larry notices a copy of the portrait of Sebastian on the bed. He asks what it is. After feeling his intelligence has been assaulted, he grabs a framed photo of himself and asks Jill what this is. He storms out. The guests have arrived and take their seats at the dining table. Larry gets Jill to say the Hungarian toast. The whole table is a buzz with laughter and smiles. Sebastian shows off his skills with the Hungarian language. This ignites the whole table into side conversations in Hungarian. The guests, finished with dinner, move into the living room. Larry locks the piano and turns on the record player and his new record. After a few seconds the record starts skipping, Sebastian grins at Larry, who turns off the player. Larry, urged by his attorney, Jones (Harry Davenport), of time running out, walks over to Kafka to make a proposition with him, but is cut off by Sebastian about to play the piano. Everyone sits down. A woman sits close to the piano, which makes Sebastian nervous. Jill asks the woman to move. Finding the piano locked, Jill searches for the key as Larry makes another move on Kafka, but is again cut off by Sebastian breaking the lid off the keys. Sebastian notices Jill has taken the ugly vase out while searching for the key, he asks her to put it away again. Sebastian mentions what he will play. Hearing how long it will be, Larry pulls Jones out of the room. The party is over, Sebastian plays the piano for Jill alone. He gets up and holds her in an embrace about to kiss her, Jill pulls away. Camera stays on the piano, silence as they are off screen. Suddenly, Sebastian comes back and plays the piano loudly and happily. She asks him to stop playing, he doesnt. Finally she leaves. He sits on the couch alone. Larry and Jones walk down the street talking about how things turned out fine with Kafka. Larry spots the portrait of Sebastian in a store window. He enters the store, and finds out what the painting is of: Sebastian. Larry leaves. Larry comes home to Jill practicing the piano. She tells him that she is sleeping better and the hiccups have disappeared. Larry sees Sebastians portrait on the wall. He comments how he thinks it looks like a man, to which Jill denies and makes up different meanings for it. Larry Paces in Jones office complaining about Sebastian. Jones brings in his secretary (Eve Arden) to get a womans point of view about the situation. Jones asks her about the problem, all the while not doing a very good job of disguising Larry as Mr. Brown. She tells him to kick Mrs. Brown out. The secretary leaves. Jones tells Larry to sell his wife on their marriage again, by using a new slant. Larry sneaks up behind Jill and puts her hands over her eyes. She thinks it is Sebastian playing around. She faints finding out it is Larry. He carries her over to the couch, as Sebastian bursts in singing. Larry leaves to get smelling salts, Sebastian puts the ugly vase away again. Larry hands Sebastian the smelling salts to wake up Jill. She wakes up laughing seeing Sebastian, but faints again seeing Larry. Larry this time carries her into the bedroom and closes the door. Larry steps out of the bedroom and talks to Sebastian about insuring his hands. Sebastian doesnt want to fight, claiming his hands are his life. Larry leads him into his office to talk more. Larry pulls out a gun, pointing it at Sebastian who pleads he doesnt love Jill. Larry punches Sebastian out, Larry wakes him up. Larry calls a hotel to reserve a room, then leaves his office, Sebastian follows. Larry pretends to forfeit, and tells Sebastian if Jill ever gets in a bad mood to just keeks her. Larry, Jill and Sebastian sit in Jones office discussing the grounds for the Bakers divorce. Larry wants to leave everything to Jill. Sebastian and Jones leave the office, allowing the Bakers to have a sentimental exchange about how their relationship has changed. Sebastian comes in, and upon seeing Jill in a mood, keeks her. Jones comes in saying the divorce is settled. Jill storms out with Sebastian after her. Larry and Jones have a drink over how well Larrys plan is going. Jill and Sebastian return, ready to go thru with the divorce once more. Sebastian keeks Larry in the stomach, Larry punches him to the floor. Now both Bakers upset again, Jones describes the plan to stage the grounds for divorce. After rehearsing, Jones calls his secretary in to be the witness, unbeknownst to her. They start their plan. The Bakers get into an argument, but come across like nervous actors. The secretary leaves the office, Jones calls her back in. They start the argument again, but when it comes time for Larry to slap Jill, he cant do it. Larry takes a drink, Sebastian gives him a pep talk. The argument begins again. Time for the slap, another drink and pep talk instead. Larry comes back, and in one motion slaps Jill then leaves. Jill and Sebastian soon follow. The Carlton Plaza: the butler visits Larry in his hotel room. He tells Larry that the entire staff, besides one, has left on the account of Sebastian. Jill paces in her bedroom, annoyed by Sebastian piano playing. Margie enters the house and makes her way into the bedroom. Her and Jill exchange pleasantries. Jill leaves and returns a few seconds later, the piano playing has stopped. Sebastian enters, accuses Margie of not liking his music, and then leaves. Sebastian calls Jill out to the living room to say he is leaving. Jill returns to the bedroom. Margie tells Jill of Larry spending time with another woman, which makes her hiccups return. Jill comes to visit Larry at his hotel room. She gives him some photos of when they were together. He looks thru them quickly, pretending not to care about them. He tries to get her to leave, she walks around the hotel room and then dashes towards the bedroom. Larry stops her from opening the door. She apologizes for everything, but he doesnt except it easily. Larry pulls out the photos again, they start laughing and remembering the photos events. Jill insists that she talks with the other woman in the bedroom. Larry agrees, but goes in first to set it up. Inside the bedroom, Larry lays on the bed smiling. This is no other girl. Larry wails in the bedroom, Jill listens nervously. Jones secretary then enters the hotel room. Jill hands her the handbag and quickly gets rid of her. Jill laughs knowing what Larry is up to. Larry runs out and grabs a glass of water, then runs back into the bedroom trying to keep up the scheme. Larry comes out again claiming it is hopeless. They say goodbye. Larry gives Jill a kiss and embrace, then says hell try and talk to the other woman again. Late at night, Sebastian enters the house and calls out to Jill. No answer. He begins to play the piano, when Larry exits the bedroom and tells him to play quieter. Sebastian now upset, grabs all the photos of himself and storms out of the house. Larry locks the door behind him and turns off all the lights going back into the bedroom. Inter-card: And the hiccups never came back. The End.
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