Jeremy Swift

The story follows Turk Henry (Antonio Banderas); a mega platinum rock star who's married to a supermodel Sheila (Olga Kurylenko) and rich beyond his wildest dreams. Turk was kicked out of his own band when he abandoned them while he was dating Sheila. Turk claims that he met Sheila when he went to a treatment resort for sex addiction. To rub it in, the band went on to be super popular without Turk and sells a million copies of their first album after splitting with Turk. Turk has now not left his Malibu mansion for 2 years. Turk doesn't do anything around the house himself. When he is angry, he orders his house servant to throw the TV into the pool for him. Turk is from Chile but claims that he is from London and cannot speak Spanish. Turk does say that the Mayor of the town erected a statue of him in Santiago after his last performance there. Turk loves the van in his driveway which has been with him since his starting days as a band member. Turk says that it is a reminder of how far he has come. Sheila forces Turk to holiday in Chile (Sheila has to drag Turk out of the house and she claims that she wants to learn about Turk's culture). Unfortunately, they arrive in the winter season and the hotel is near empty. Turk is only interested in drinking beer and sleeping, and thus Sheila is forced to take a tour bus into the jungle to see the Llamas, by herself. The tour bus has 2 more couples with her. One couple on the tour bus had brought along weapons to shoot the Llamas, but Sheila intervenes and stops them from shooting the animals. The animals instead attack the couple, and the man dies with a strong head butt into his chest, and he discharges his rifle which hits the woman, killing her on the spot. Sheila is mysteriously abducted by a group of renegades, ship-less pirates. Sheila is imprisoned with fellow Kidnappees Sandrine (Anna Francolini) & Charlie (Jeremy Swift). Charlie runs a double-glazing company back in London and offers to pay the ransom in windows. Sheila realizes that the gang are not hardened criminals, and the leader Juan admits that this is their first kidnapping, and they have been pirates for less than 9 hours. The kidnappers figure out that Sheila is Turk's wife (as she had a tattoo of his famous band Metal Assassins on her hand) and call the hotel for a ransom of $ 1 MM, which is apparently chump change for Turk. Turk claims that once he paid $2 MM for a tortoise. Turk calls his agents John Hardigger (David Mitchell) in London to ask for the money. John refuses to speak with Turk and that leaves him to deal with John's assistant Marybeth (Aisling Loftus). The money is made available at a local bank, but Turk has to go and pick it. He is terrified to "do something himself". Ben Harding (Mark Valley) is the FBI agent in Santiago assigned to the case. Ramon (Fernando Godoy) is Ben's local liaison. Ben hates Santiago and the decaying smell of the town. Ben believes that Chile is a dead end and would love to go back to the states. He wants to investigate the terrorist angle in the Sheila kidnapping as that would mean a sure-fire promotion for him. Ben doesn't want Turk to get the money as that would mean that the case would be settled soon and no promotion for him. Ben tells Turk that he cannot be allowed to pay the random and fund the terrorists. So, when Turk gets the money, Ben chases him all over town to snatch it from Turk, and Ben is successful in taking away the money suitcase from Turk. On the way, Turk runs into his own statue in the city. Ben warns Turk to stay in his hotel. Meanwhile a soft attraction is brewing between Sheila and kidnapper gang leader Juan Carlos (Ben Cura). Juan reveals that all the gang members are typical middle-class folks, with regular jobs. But their meager incomes were not enough to help them meet their expenses. With no other option, Turk calls Marybeth in code language (as he knows Ben is tapping his phone) and asks her to come to Chile. Marybeth reaches Chile & hires security consultant Clive Muggleton (Martin Dingle Wall), who keeps making inappropriate comic sexual advances towards Marybeth. Ben leans on Clive's company and gets them to drop the case, but Clive approaches Turk and says he will take the case for $ 0.5 MM. The team of Turk, Marybeth and Clive devise a plan to confuse Ben and extract money from the bank to pay the ransom. But the plan goes wrong when Ben follows Clive and seemingly kills him in a hands on fight. With Clive gone, Turk has no option but to deliver the money himself. He takes a boat, but Ben is in close pursuit. But then Clive shows up to Marybeth and says that he faked his death to escape Ben. Marybeth and Clive both decide to help Turk. Turk reaches the kidnappers lair as per the delivery instructions, but first Ben and then Marybeth and Clive also get there. Juan is angry as he asked Turk to come alone. Ben is killed by his own hand grenade as he tries to disrupt the deal between Turk and Juan. Turk declares his love for Sheila and since Juan is a big fan of Turk's band, they make a deal. But when Turk meets Sheila, she asks Turk to prove his love for her. Turk sings an original song for Sheila and wins her back Back at the hotel Marybeth tells Turk that John has drained 4 of his clients bank accounts and disappeared. Turk is broke. He has to take club gigs in the US to survive. Meanwhile Clive tracks down John, kills him and steals the money.

It is not easy being the brother of a benevolent and beloved saint, and no one knows that better than Fred Claus (Vince Vaughn). After struggling for years to live up to the example set by his younger sibling Nicholas (Paul Giamatti), Fred has finally given up.Fred is working as a repo man taken to stealing the items he repossesses. His shady tactics land him in jail. While Mrs. Claus vehemently insists that Fred fend for himself, Nicholas refuses to sit idly by as his brother rots in jail and agrees to set bail if Fred will repay the debt by coming to the North Pole and help make toys for the upcoming Christmas season. But Fred isn`t nearly as productive as your average elf, and he`s got quite an attitude to boot. This makes for a humorous disaster wherein Fred tries hard to find out just how far the patience of a saint can be pushed before jolly old Santa reaches his breaking point.

Young orphan Oliver Twist (Barney Clark) is forcibly brought to a workhouse by the beadle Mr. Bumble (Jeremy Swift) in an unidentified town in England on his ninth birthday. At 9, Oliver was considered too old for the orphanage he was living in. The workhouse was a place for the poor and destitute to live and work in exchange for basic necessities. Oliver is put into a room with hundreds of boys who are asked to sift through old roles and pick out the threads that are not yet rotten. These threads are used to create new ropes which are deployed on English battle ships. Oliver and the other resident children are treated poorly and given very little food. Facing starvation, the boys select Oliver (through a short thread lottery) to ask for more food at the next meal, which he tentatively does. This results in Oliver being chastised, and the workhouse officials, who are wealthy, well-fed, hypocritical men, decide to get rid of him. The board of the workhouse put out an advertisement giving 5 pounds as an incentive to take Oliver away as an apprentice. A chimney sweeper responds to the Advertisement, and the board approves of transferring legal guardianship of Oliver to the chimney sweeper. When the matter goes to court, Oliver is in tears and the judge takes pity on him and refuses the transfer request. The judge instructs the workhouse to treat Oliver kindly. After nearly being sold as an apprentice to a cruel chimney sweep, Oliver is sent to Mr. Sowerberry (Michael Heath), a coffin-maker, whose wife (Gillian Hanna) and senior apprentice take an instant dislike to the newcomer. Oliver is meted out even more poor treatment, where Oliver is given cold food that was meant for the dog and given a place to sleep under Mr Sowerberry's desk. The older apprentice Noah is not happy to see Oliver who represents competition. Mr Sowerberry is kind to Oliver and starts to use him as pall bearer at children's funerals. Driven to despair by the atrocities, Oliver snaps and attacks Noah (Chris Overton), the snotty older apprentice, for having insulted his mother. Knowing his life with the Sowerberry's will only get worse, Oliver escapes on foot. With little food, Oliver determines to walk 70 miles to London. After he collapses from exhaustion, a kindly old woman gives him food and lodgings for the night. After a week of travel, he arrives at the city, barefoot and penniless. He meets Jack Dawkins (Harry Eden), or "The Artful Dodger," a boy-thief who takes Oliver to his home and hideout at Saffron Hill that he shares with many other young pickpockets and their eccentric elderly leader, Fagin (Ben Kingsley). Soon, Oliver is being groomed to join their gang. On his first outing with the pickpockets, two of the boys steal a man's handkerchief and Oliver is framed. However, he is proven innocent by an eyewitness, and the owner of the handkerchief (the wealthy Mr. Brownlow (Edward Hardwicke)) takes pity on Oliver, who had collapsed from a fever in the courtroom. Brownlow informally adopts Oliver, giving him new clothes and the promise of a good education. However, while out running an errand for Brownlow, Oliver is forcibly returned to the pickpocket gang by Fagin's associate, the evil Bill Sikes (Jamie Foreman), and the young prostitute Nancy (Leanne Rowe) who is in a complex and abusive relationship with Sikes. Fagin and Sikes are worried that Oliver would "peach," and tell the authorities about their criminal activity. Oliver is put under supervision until Bill Sikes discovers the boy's connection to the rich Mr. Brownlow. Sikes and his accomplice, Toby Crackit (Mark Strong), force Oliver to aid them in robbing Brownlow's house. They are discovered and Oliver is wounded in a brief shootout between Brownlow and Sikes. As the three escape, Bill decides to murder Oliver to ensure his silence, but falls into a nearby river before he can take action. Sikes survives his near drowning but is confined to bed with a heavy fever. Fagin, despite treating Oliver kindly, remains crime-focused and plots with Sikes to kill Oliver when Sikes has recovered. Nancy has a maternal love for Oliver and does not want to see him hurt, but she is controlled by the abusive Sikes. She drugs Bill and goes to Brownlow's house where she arranges to have him meet her on London Bridge at midnight so she can provide information about Oliver. At the meeting, Nancy cautiously reveals that Oliver is staying with Fagin, and that the authorities will easily find them. Brownlow leaves to call the police. The Artful Dodger, who had been sent by a suspicious Fagin to spy on Nancy, had heard everything and is bullied by Bill Sikes to give up the information. Sikes is furious at Nancy's betrayal and brutally beats her to death in their apartment. The next day, information about Oliver and Fagin appears in the newspaper, along with Nancy's murder and Sikes is a suspect. Sikes's ever-present dog, Bullseye, is a dead giveaway to his identity. After unsuccessfully trying to kill the dog, Sikes takes up residence with Toby Crackit. Fagin, Oliver, and the boys are hiding there too, after escaping their previous location before the police could find it. Bullseye escapes his master's cruelty and leads a group of police and locals to the group's hideout. Eventually, Dodger, outraged at Sikes for killing the good-heart person Nancy, reveals their location to authorities. Bill Sikes takes Oliver onto the roof, knowing they won't shoot if the boy is with him. When trying to scale the building using a rope, Sikes, distracted by his dog, loses his footing and accidentally hangs himself. Sometime later, Oliver is living comfortably with Mr. Brownlow again. Fagin was arrested (though the fate of the pickpockets is unknown), and Oliver wishes to visit him in jail. Brownlow takes him to the prison, where they find Fagin ranting and wailing in his cell. Oliver is distraught at Fagin's fate, as he had been something of a father figure to Oliver. As Mr. Brownlow escorts a tearful Oliver to a carriage, gallows are being set up in the courtyard. Townspeople begin to gather to watch Fagin's execution.