John Witherspoon

Calvin (Marlon Wayans) has just been released from prison. They open the door of the prison to reveal him to be a midget. His accomplice, wannabe rapper Percy (Tracy Morgan), picks up Calvin and tells him they need to get a diamond from a local jewelry store, which will pay each of them 50,000 dollars. Percy (P-Unit) says he needs it to start his record studio. Meanwhile, at a swank restaurant, Darryl (Shawn Wayans) is talking to his friend Jimmy (David Alan Grier), telling him to come out when the time is right. Soon Vanessa (Kerry Washington) arrives and tells Darryl she has news. Right before she says it all, Darryl's friend pops out playing "Gonna Have My Baby". She says that she actually got a promotion, and he pops out singing "Celebration" before shouting out, "REMIX!" Eventually he is shooed by Darryl, and it is revealed she doesn't want a baby like Darryl does. Eventually, Calvin and Percy reach the jewelry store, where the diamond is located. They go inside the store, with Calvin in a duffel bag. Percy puts down the bag and begins to talk to a worker, who, after Percy tells her he is a rapper, begins acting "gangsta" to get his business. Meanwhile, Calvin goes under the table holding the diamond and removes the diamond by sawing a circle under the table and removing it. Calvin then gets back in the bag and crawls back to where Percy dropped him. Also, a dog gets in the bag with Calvin not knowing. When Percy picks up the bag, an old lady notices her dog is missing and alerts security, leading to the diamond's disappearance being noticed. Percy runs out with the bag and they get in the car. As they take off, they only drive around in circles, as a boot got put on their car. They then get out and run on foot as two police men chase them. They hide in a store while police find another black guy and begin beating him. Meanwhile, Calvin hides the diamond in a lady's purse to get rid of the evidence. Calvin and Percy meet up after police leave, believing they lost their man. They decide to follow the couple home. When they reach their home, they discover that Darryl wants a baby. This leads to the idea to disguise Calvin as a baby and get the diamond back. Percy rings the bell and hides in the bushes. Darryl and Vanessa answer the door, finding the "baby" and a note from Percy asking them to take care for his baby because he could not. After an attempt to call child services, they discover they can't bring him in, as they're closed. When they change his diaper, they are in shock. Vanessa's father (John Witherspoon) lives with them. He's the only one who doesn't trust the baby. After Calvin coughs horribly, they decide to take him to the doctors. At the doctors, they discover a scar from a knife fight or appendix removal, as well as a tattoo, which they blame on bad parenting. After the checkup, Calvin steals the purse with the diamond in it while Darryl and Vanessa try to figure out what they have to do with the baby. Darryl wants to keep him while Vanessa wants to get rid of him. Calvin, meanwhile, runs into a police officer outside the room, who treats him like a baby. Before he can check the purse, Vanessa finds him and grabs the purse. Right when she is about to turn Calvin over, he calls her "Mama", leading to her keeping him for the weekend. After bringing him home, they decide to invite their friends to meet the baby and loan them baby stuff for the weekend. During the weekend, Calvin has to suffer several unpleasant humiliations, such as bath time. He believes Vanessa will be joining him in the bath, only for it to be Darryl. Darryl strips naked, jumps in the bath and Vanessa leaves them. It is here that Darryl decides to relieve himself of a large build up of flatulence and breaks wind several times in the bath. Calvin is forced to suffer all through bath time, as Darryl's flatulence is incessant and he breaks wind powerfully and without hesitation. Cut to Percy going into a shady bar run by mafia kingpin Walken (Chazz Palminteri) who offered to pay them for the diamond. He threatens Percy, telling him he had 24 hours before his goons would get involved. Back at the home, Darryl and Vanessa's friends arrive. They include Greg (Lochlyn Munro), Brittany (Brittany Daniel), Richard (Fred Stoller) and Janet (Alex Borstein). They take turns trying to describe the ugly baby, such as "National Geographic Beauty". Brittany and Janet go into the kitchen with Calvin. Calvin pulls himself onto Brittany, who suggests breast feeding after he tugs at her breasts a few times. He says yes, expecting her to do it, but is sadly mistaken when Janet offers to do it. Calvin bites her and runs away. Soon we see their friends leave, with Brittany stopping to give Calvin a kiss, leading to him frenching her. After all their friends leave, Vanessa and Darryl put Calvin to bed. Calvin decides to stay up and wait to take the diamond and leave, but is incapable of fighting off the lullaby, and falls asleep. He wakes up later that night and goes downstairs to call Percy and get the diamond. While on the phone, though, Pops comes in, shotgun in hand. He starts threatening Calvin before Darryl comes in. Darryl takes Calvin away, not believing Pops, and warms up some milk for him. He then sits Calvin down and begins an emotional speech about wanting to be a father. Vanessa watches as he talks, and finally laughs as Darryl and Calvin drink their milk. When asked why, she reveals the milk to be Janet's breast milk. This causes both of them to spit it out. Darryl and Vanessa begin getting romantic as Calvin watches in his crib. The next morning, Vanessa wakes up as Darryl comes in. She looks happy, saying she can't remember the last time they did it twice in one night. He looks puzzled as Calvin comes up from under the blanket. Vanessa makes a nice breakfast for Pops and Darryl. Pops comes down while Calvin is watching a kids show. She gives Pops his breakfast while he turns the TV to the news. Right before they show a photo of Calvin, the suspect of the diamond heist, he repeatedly cries out D-Rex, leading Vanessa to change it back. Pops begins to read the paper as Calvin eyes his breakfast. Soon he jumps over and grabs his food, one item at a time. Eventually Pops realizes his food is gone and blames Calvin. Vanessa brushes him off as he leaves for a diner. Darryl comes down stairs and grabs his breakfast as Vanessa leaves for work. He begins to feed Calvin who hides his face, prompting a game of peek-a-boo. Soon Calvin gets tired of it and smacks him over the head with a frying pan. As Calvin drags Darryl's body, he grabs the diamond out of her purse. Vanessa comes back in as she forgot her purse and wakes up Darryl from his unconsciousness. She scolds him for sleeping, and he looks puzzled. Calvin hides the diamond in a diaper bag while Vanessa leaves. Darryl and Calvin go to the park and play multiple games, each one resulting with Darryl getting hit between the legs. Eventually Darryl and his friends go for ice cream, leaving Calvin with Brittany and Janet. Percy shows up as Calvin tries to find the right diaper bag. He grabs one as the moms find him, thinking he was trying to kidnap Calvin. They chase Percy down as he tries to run off with the bag. He gets beaten before getting away. Darryl arrives and hears the news, deciding to take Calvin home. As they load the car, Calvin begs for keys. He keeps on whining and kicking Darryl in the shin until he gives Calvin the keys. Calvin gets in the car and takes off, leading Darryl to believe someone stole the car. He stops the mini van driver (Molly Shannon) and begs her to chase down the car. She does and drives like a mad man as she tracks down the car. After a lengthy chase, the car is stopped, and the police open the car to reveal Calvin crying in the backseat. The police are convinced the car jacker got away. Calvin is tied up and Darryl debates going to a hockey game. They decide to go to the game with Calvin. At the game, Calvin takes the diamond and swallows it to hide it from Darryl. He then grabs a beer from the man next to him and drinks it to keep it down. The drink lady comes down and asks if he wants some more, and he gets some, as do Darryl and his two friends. Calvin makes a crude comment ("nice ass!") as the lady passes Darryl and she believes it was him, calling him a pig. Calvin calls her a tramp, and she pours a beer on Darryl. Calvin drinks the beer again, leading him(the guy to Calvins left) to believe Darryl did it. Soon a cheap check costs a visiting team's player a trip to the box as fans boo him. He then challenges all of them, and Calvin throws a beer at the man. The player, thinking it was Darryl, comes into the stands and Calvin climbs up on top of the player and attacks him. The man then throws Calvin to the ground and stomps on him. We see a bruised Calvin in bed as Darryl talks about not being a good father. Then he decides to throw Calvin a birthday party. Percy brings the diaper bag to Walken, who opens it to reveal nothing but dirty diapers and other baby items. He is then told by the Walken that he'll give him more time, but he better deliver. After Percy leaves, the boss tells his men that he suspects betrayal by Percy's partner, and to follow Percy. At the birthday party, Calvin picks a fight with D-Rex (Rob Schneider), by calling him a loser in a blue dinosaur suit who has no money. Then that leads to Calvin running behind D-Rex,ripping his tail wide open,crawling up into his suit, and beating him up from the inside! Eventually Darryl gets Calvin away from the dead D-Rex to play football with the other boys and their dads. At the start, the other team, led by Greg who stiff arms the children, are winning. Soon though, Calvin and another kid decide to kick it up a notch and use brutal force to take down the other team, leading them to victory. After Greg gets hit between the legs by Calvin making a touchdown, his son walks up to him(Greg),says "Dad,you suck!,"and kicks him in the head. Meanwhile, Darryl answers a knock at the door where Percy says he is Calvin's father here to get him. Darryl beats him up, which the mob goons see, leading them to believe Darryl was Percy's partner, and he took the diamond for himself. Meanwhile, Pops watches the news at a diner and sees Calvin as the prime suspect in the diamond heist. He decides to stop him. Back at the party, Calvin is given a cake and begins to cry, as he never had a birthday or parents. Pops shows up with a teddy bear, saying he was wrong about Calvin. Calvin goes inside where he sees Janet give her son Castor Oil. Calvin decides to drink it and poop out the diamond. He drinks it and goes as Vanessa and Darryl watch. Darryl leaves Vanessa to change his diaper, where she finds the diamond, thinking it to be a diamond for her ring, which had none. She decides to take him out to dinner, leaving Pops and Calvin alone. It is now that Calvin reveals to Pops that he is a criminal. He then beats up Pops and calls Percy, telling him to show up in an hour. At the restaurant, Darryl tries to tell Vanessa that he didn't get that for her, but he stops when she says she wants to adopt Calvin. Afterwards, Vanessa and Darryl come home to find Pops strangling Calvin. Vanessa then calls the retirement home, who come to take away Pops. He shouts "The teddy bear knows!" Before being taken away. Vanessa puts Calvin in bed as she cries and goes in the bathroom. Darryl remembers the bear comment and finds the bear, revealing it to be a camera. He hooks it up to the TV, and watches as Calvin reveals himself not to be a baby to Pops on screen. He runs upstairs to tell Vanessa, both of whom discover Calvin to be missing as is the diamond. Percy, while driving with Calvin, tells his partner that Walken thinks Darryl betrayed Percy and he has the diamond, so they are free to keep the diamond. Calvin realizes Darryl and Vanessa are in danger and he needs to go back. He does and finds Darryl, where the two confront each other about him lying about being a baby. Calvin apologizes, and before it can go any farther, the Walken and his two goons bust in. They threaten to hurt Calvin and Darryl. Eventually, Calvin knocks out the goons while the boss threatens Darryl while still maintaining his baby disguise. Calvin comes in and throws a plane that hits the boss below the waist. The police come in and arrest the mob boss and his goons. Calvin returns the diamond to the police and they tell Darryl he will receive a 100,000 dollar reward. After the police leave, Darryl and Calvin have a tearful goodbye, where Calvin reveals he liked being their kid. Darryl follows Calvin outside and they decide to go to a bar. During the credits, though, Pops and Calvin are looking at Vanessa and Janet's baby. Calvin remarks that the baby looks just like his father.

The movie begins when a robber, disguised as Santa Claus, breaks into Craig and Day-Day's house at 3:37 AM on Christmas Eve. Craig fights with the robber, trashing their apartment while making frantic, futile attempts to wake Day-Day. The robber escapes with Craig and Day-Day's Christmas presents and rent money. The same morning, the police come over to get a report. After the police leave, Mrs. Pearly comes in and says that if the two do not pay their rent money by the end of the day, she will evict them. Furthermore, she promises to send her homosexual ex-convict son, Damon (who just got out of prison after 12 years), after them if they do not pay in a timely manner. The same day, Craig and Day-Day get jobs as "Top Flight Security Guards" from Moly, the property manager and owner of a notoriously squalid doughnut shop and the shopping center that they are assigned to patrol. Later that day, they meet Donna and Money Mike, who run a fledgling shop called 'Pimps and Hoes'. The shopping center is also the home of a BBQ rib restaurant called 'Bros. BBQ', owned by the cousins' fathers, Willie and Elroy. A couple of baseheads try to rob Money Mike's store, but Craig and Day-Day catch them both. Mike offers them a cash reward, but Craig refuses it and instead invites him to his Christmas party. Willie and Elroy are having trouble with some of the children. When one of them kicks Elroy, he retaliates by taking out a belt and starts a series of beatings on the kids. Then, shortly after Moly gives Craig and Day-Day a lunch break, a gang of thugs (supposedly the grandsons of some of the carolers that were chased off by Day-Day for loitering in front of the corner store) chase after Craig and Day-Day. After failing to catch them, the gang members proceed to beat up Moly for supposedly hiding them, resulting in Craig and Day-Day (who witnessed the entire ordeal) throwing away their uniforms and quitting after witnessing what happened to Moly, and this causes Moly to "fire" them on-the-spot (due to Moly accusing them of lazing around and allowing him to be beaten, even though they were just given a lunch break). As revenge, Willie rats Moly out to the Department of Health. Later that night, Craig and Day-Day throw a rent party to recoup their stolen rent money and stay in their apartment. While Money Mike is in the bathroom, Damon appears and attempts to sexually assault him, but fails when Money Mike crunches his testicles with pliers. Damon then proceeds to chase Money Mike when he tries to run away. Also Mrs. Pearly comes on to Willie when he uses her bathroom, causing Craig's mother, Betty, to come in and attack her when she catches the two. Craig and Day-Day see the robber and give chase, running into other obstacles (including a psychotic but comedic old man armed with a double-barreled shotgun, played by Epps) and are ultimately successful. The robber eventually gets run over by Pinky's limousine. The movie ends with Craig and Day-Day retrieving their stolen rent money and Christmas presents and tying the robber up on his roof. During the credits, it is revealed that Craig and Donna hooked up after Craig returned, Damon is still chasing Money Mike throughout the neighborhood, and that Ms. Pearly tried to stop the party by calling the police, but they left after receiving marijuana as a bribe.

The Saturday Night Live (1975) character gets a big screen treatment. Because of his salacious language, late-night radio advice-show host Leon Phelps, along with his sweet and loyal producer Julie, is fired from his Chicago gig. They can't find another job. About that time, two things happen: he gets a letter from a wealthy former lover who offers to take care of him (but she doesn't sign her real name, so Leon, an inveterate Casanova, has no idea who she is), and a group of angry cuckolds, all of whom have surprised their wives in flagrante delicto with Leon (who has a distinctive tattoo on his booty), are closing in, armed and dangerous. Can he find the sugar mommy and escape the wrath of the mob of husbands? What about Julie? —<jhailey@hotmail.com>

After the events of Friday (1995), that are summarized by Craig, his father Willie decides it would be safer for Craig to move to Rancho Cucamonga and live with his uncle Elroy and cousin Day-Day, who had won the lottery and were able to afford a nice house in a middle class neighborhood. Elroy spends his days consuming large amounts of marijuana and making sex tapes with his wife, Auntie Suga while Day-Day works at a record store and tries to avoid his pregnant ex-girlfriend D'Wana and her violent sister Baby D. Day-Day shows Craig around the house and neighborhood, introducing him to his neighbor Mrs. Ho-Kym. While there, they witness another neighbor family, Jokerand his two brothers, return home in their lowrider. Day-Day explains to Craig that actually after winning the lottery, all of the taxes and fees that were taken out only left them with enough to buy their house and car. However, a letter carrier delivers a delinquency notice that their house could be repossessed, but Day-Day is running late for work and unable to bring it to his dad's attention first. Craig joins his aunt and uncle for a joint which is strong enough to make him pass out, and he later goes to visit Day-Day at work. While there, Day-Day finds D'Wana vandalizing his car with Baby D for the second time that day, and attempts to confront them, only to be physically attacked by Baby D. Pinky arrives at the store finding that it has been locked up while Day-Day and his friend/coworker Roach are in the back. After an armed scuffle with Craig in which Pinky mistook him for a robber, Craig gains the upper hand and holds Pinky's gun on him, attempting to explain that he's Day-Day's cousin. When Day-Day returns and confirms this, Pinky fires both him and Roach. Craig, Day-Day and Roach then try to figure out how to resolve the delinquency issue so they can keep their house. Craig remembers seeing one of the Joker brothers carrying a hydraulic pump from their car inside, suspecting that they may be hiding cash inside. Craig convinces Day-Day and Roach to help him get inside the Joker's house and see what's inside the pump. The trio drug the Joker's guard dog Chico with an edible Roach had given them, rendering the dog unconscious. Craig then sneaks into the Joker's house while the three brothers are partying with girls they brought home. Craig locates the pump and confirms that drug cash is hidden inside. Narrowly avoiding detection by Baby Joker, he slips into Karla's room where he flirts with her before escaping out of her upstairs window. Meanwhile, concerned that Craig is taking too long, Day-Day and Roach knock on the Joker's front door, which is answered by all three brothers armed with handguns and an assault rifle. The brothers take Day-Day and Roach hostage while trying to figure out what happened to their money. After learning that Craig could be in trouble, Willie returns to the neighborhood at the same time Deebo and his fellow prison inmate and younger brother Tyrone arrive, the latter two having been tracking Craig down all day after they escaped from prison so Deebo could have revenge on Craig. Willie teams up with Elroy, and the two incapacitate two of the Joker brothers and Craig is able to free Day-Day and Roach. Soon after, the police arrive and arrest all three Joker brothers on drug charges and re-arrest Deebo and Tyrone for their prison break. Craig hands the cash from the pump over to Day-Day and his uncle so they can pay off their debt and keep their house, then Craig returns home with his dad, having learned the suburbs aren't any safer than the hood.

A group of young people take an old bus from Harlem to Miami to make a rap music video there. A group of young people leave Harlem for a bus trip down to Miami. The voyage starts off with problems, but it ends up becoming a learning experience, as they end up learning things about each other they had not previously known. —Guy Johns

A ship of dead men steers into Brooklyn harbor. It keeps going until it runs aground. A large wolf jumps from the ship. The wolf is the vampire Maximilian [Eddie Murphy], the sole survivor of the massacre of a tribe of vampires living on an island in the Bermuda Triangle. Max has come to Brooklyn to find Rita Veder [Angela Bassett], the half-vampire daughter born to a human and a vampire from his tribe. Meanwhile, Julius Jones [Kadeem Hardison] isn't having a good night. First, there was that ship that ran aground and plowed right through the building where he and Silas Green [John Witherspoon] were working. Then his woman kicked him out of the house for snoring while otherwise engaged. Now, two thugs are after him for his money or his blood. Then, just as Julius is about to meet his maker, the vampire Maximilian shows up, neatly kills off the two thugs, and informs Julius that he is to become his renfield and that the first thing he must do is retrieve Max's coffin from the ship. Ship and dock are crawling with the law, one of whom is Detective Rita Veder. Rita and her partner Justice [Allen Payne] have been sent to investigate the accident in the harbor and the 18 bodies aboard that were found drained of blood. While checking out the ship, Rita falls through a rotten floorboard and lands in the cargohold where she finds a coffin and gets a glimpse of Max, who recognizes her immediately. Rita chases him, but he disappears. When she returns to the cargohold, the coffin is gone, a human ear remaining in its place. Max and Julius take the coffin to Julius's house, an apartment he rents from Silas. The ship's log is retrieved, but it is written in some obscure language that no one at the university can decipher, so it is sent to Dr Zeko for translation. Zeko's turns out to be a nightclub, but Zeko [Zakes Mokae] is able to tell that the log speaks about a nosferatu on board. As Rita sits at a table, waiting for Justice to return from a phone call, she doesn't notice that a cobra in a nearby terrarium has escaped and is crawling toward her. Fortunately, Max is seated nearby and catches the cobra just in time, giving Max the perfect opportunity to introduce himself to Rita. He asks her to dance, believing that one dance with him will make her his, but Justice returns and Julius butts in with his jive talk, so Rita splits, not at all enthralled with Max. Rita and Justice go back to the apartment Rita shares with roommate Nikki [Simbi Khali]. Nikki comes on to Justice but he turns her down and leaves. Instead, Nikki picks up Max and brings him home. Rita overhears the bumping and screaming in Nikki's bedroom. The next morning, Rita finds that Nikki has split with all her belongings, and there's a note saying that she's getting an apartment with a man she just met. Rita assumes it is Justice, and she becomes very jealous. Time is growing short. Max has to start using drastic measures, like taking on the personas of other people, such as Preacher Pauly and stupid Guido in order to get closer to Rita. But Max's plans seem to backfire, so he takes the direct route and saves her from being run over by a speeding taxi. In gratitude, Rita accepts a dinner date with him. Max hurries back to Julius's apartment and casts every spell he knows to change it from a pigsty to an elegant lovenest, complete with candelabras, fireplace, and a baby grand piano. He finally manages to get his dance with Rita as well as a bite on her neck. Julius is enjoying the benefits of working for a vampire, e.g., driving the black limo with vanity plates that say 'RIP'. He is also having to adjust to the side-effects, e.g., acquiring a taste for bugs and losing parts of his body. First his ear, then his right hand, then his hair, then an eye, then his whole right arm. Meanwhile, Justice is following up a lead that suggests Julius might have been involved in the killing of the two thugs a few nights ago. The next morning, Justice pays a visit to Julius's apartment where he meets Silas Green who tells him that Rita was there all night with the new tenant, some suave guy. Just then, Justice receives a call from the dispatcher sending him to investigate a DOA at Brooklyn City Hall. It turns out to be Nikki. Justice goes to Rita's apartment to tell her about Nikki. As he is holding her, Rita's tears turn into fangs and she tries to bite his neck. Out of the corner of her eye, she notices that her reflection in the mirror is fading. She runs to Max, who tells her of her father, the vampire. Justice goes to see Dr Zeko, who tells him the story of Rita's mother, a researcher who was studying the vampires on his island and who succumbed to the powers of the "dark one." Rita is the result, he says. He warns Justice that he must kill Max and do it before Rita loses all of her humanity. Max attempts to teach Rita how to feed, but she refuses. When she tries to run away, Max retrieves her and brings her to his apartment, intending to leave for the island in the morning. He brings Silas to her, but Justice and Zeko arrive just in time to stop her from feeding on him. A fight breaks out, of course, but Max is easily able to dodge their fists and stakes. Justice searches out Max's coffin and opens it, prepared to stake him, but he finds Rita laying there. Rita begins to advance on Justice, her fangs showing. She stops long enough to share a kiss with Max and then stakes him, claiming that this part of her must die. Rita and Justice end up in each others' arms. Epiloque: Max is dead, and Julius doesn't have much left in the way of limbs, skin, arms, etc., but Silas reminds him that he does have the limo, and they decide to go for a ride. In the backseat, Julius finds a ring left behind by Max and places it on his finger. POOF! Julius has back all his parts (and then some). There's a new vampire in Brooklyn, and his name is Julius Jones. [Original Synopsis by bj_kuehl.]

While on a stakeout at an amusement park in Los Angeles, California, police detective Ned Ravine (Armand Assante) is approached by a flirtatious, sultry blonde woman (Sean Young). However, he must leave her to pursue culprit Milo Crumley (Blake Clark), known as the "pantyhose bandit." After arresting Milo, Ned, who is also a defense attorney, offers to represent him in court. At his law office, Ned relies on his devoted secretary, Laura (Sherilyn Fenn), who is always efficient except when tortured by flashbacks of her abusive husband. After successfully defending Milo in court, Ned receives a surprise visit from Lola Cain, the blonde woman from the amusement park. The beautiful seductress asks Ned to meet her the following evening to look over some papers that she cannot understand. While workaholic Ned is on police duty at night, his wife, Lana Ravine (Kate Nelligan), has been having an affair with auto mechanic Frank Kelbo (Christopher McDonald). Lana asks Frank's advice about her husband's accident insurance policy, and learns that it contains a triple indemnity rider worth $9 million, if Ned is shot with a pistol, falls from a northbound train, and drowns in a freshwater stream. Undaunted by the complications, Lana plots to murder Ned that weekend while he travels to a legal symposium in Santa Barbara, California, and agrees to share the insurance payout with her lover. She instructs Frank to tamper with Ned's car, so he will be forced to take the train. At his office, Ned receives instructions to meet Lola at Le Hot Club and from there, the two proceed to her mansion. After looking over her "papers," a laundry receipt and a lottery ticket, Ned succumbs to Lola's sexual advances and engages in various erotic scenarios with her throughout the house. In the morning, Ned reminds Lola he is married and cannot continue their affair. The rejection shocks Lola, and she gives Ned a deranged look. Meanwhile, criminal Max Shady (James Remar) is released from prison and is determined to take revenge on Ned for losing his case seven years ago. Laura shows Ned the multiple death threats Shady has faxed to the office, but the attorney believes the criminal just needs to vent his anger and is not concerned. At home, Ned wants to make amends with his estranged wife and buys her a pet skunk, but she is unimpressed and remains focused on killing him. When Ned treats Laura to shopping and dinner for her birthday, she looks at her handsome boss with affection, hoping he will take an interest in her. At the restaurant, an obsessive Lola interrupts them and threatens Ned with an ice pick, giving Laura another reason to worry about her boss's safety. Unable to use his car after the engine goes missing, Ned initially considers flying to Santa Barbara. He is fearful about taking the train since several members of his family have been killed in train wrecks, but Lana persuades him and advises that he stand in the vestibule between cars to calm his nerves. Lana and Frank secretly get on the train with Ned, who is also being followed on board by Max Shady. As the train leaves the station, Ned is anxious and sweating. After he gets up from his seat and walks toward the vestibule, Lana follows. She enters the area and shoots a man in the back, who is standing by the exit door and wearing a suit similar to Ned's. She believes she has shot her husband, but the man who falls out of the train, riddled with bullets, is Max Shady. Ned appears from the adjacent bathroom and is grateful to his wife for risking her life to protect him. However, as a police officer, he must arrest her for Shady's murder, but agrees to serve as her defense attorney. At the murder trial, Ned succeeds in convincing the jury that his wife should be acquitted. As soon as she is free, Lana kills her accomplice Frank over concerns he might betray her. Lola witnesses the deed and blackmails Lana. Ned walks in the house as Lola is talking to his wife, and denies knowing the blonde woman. Later, an angry Ned goes to Lola's mansion and warns her to stay out of his life. During their altercation, Lola reveals that Lana is her identical twin sister, who stole her boyfriend Dwayne, the love of her life. When a confused Ned remarks that the two women look completely different, Lola explains that Lana destroyed her original face with a shovel and she had to endure fifty-three plastic surgery operations. Ned is amazed at the beautiful result, but Lola disagrees, calling herself "ugly." She says Dwayne abandoned her for Lana after he saw her transformation. Lola's attempt to destroy her sister's marriage to Ned was part of her revenge. She also tells Ned that Lana murdered the mechanic. When Ned informs Lola that the mechanic's name was Frank Kelbo, she is devastated, realizing that Frank was the son of Dwayne, whose last name was Kelbo. Returning home, Ned finds hot water running in the bathtub, but his wife is absent. Laura, who has been conducting her own investigation, arrives to alert Ned that his wife and Frank were plotting to murder him so they could collect on his insurance policy. She also confides about her difficult past and fleeing from her obsessive-compulsive, abusive husband. As Ned and Laura talk in the kitchen, Lana saws a break in the upstairs handrail, but Lola surprises her sister and drowns her in the bathtub. When Ned goes to investigate the faucet noise, he discovers his wife's dead body and is assaulted by Lola. Meanwhile, downstairs, Laura's sadistic husband sneaks into the house and confronts his wife. After Ned and Laura subdue their attackers, they embrace and share a passionate kiss. Suddenly, the two apparently dead sisters recover and rush at Ned and Laura with sharp objects. However, Laura proves to be a skilled sharpshooter as she simultaneously kills Lana and Lola with two pistols, but blowing out Ned's eardrums when she fired the guns close to his head. In the final scene, Laura and Ned propose marriage and spend their first night together, as the pet skunk watches from his hiding spot in the dresser.

To impress his new girlfriend, a man agrees to look after her friend's kids, only to find that they are uncontrollably rambunctious. Robin Harris recounting his disastrous first date with the beautiful girl named Jamika. Tagging along for the date are Jamika's mild-mannered son Leon and Jamika's friend Bebe's three rude, crude, and obnoxious kids to a theme park called Fun World. Chaos ensues when Bebe's kids enter the theme park with adventures including being chased by a group of government agents, destroying the Titanic, and being on trial. Also causing trouble when a first date turns sour due to interference by Harris' alimony-demanding ex-wife Dorthea and her best friend Vivian. —Anthony Pereyra {hypersonic91@yahoo.com} When Robin meets the lovely Jamika he thinks he's in heaven. But when he meets her friend Bebe's children, whom she is looking after, he knows he's in hell. Bebe's kids are the most obnoxious, irritating, pain in the butt kids he has ever met. —Brian W Martz <B.Martz@Genie.com> Robin Harris tries to impress his new girlfriend Jamika by taking her and her son Leon to Fun World. What he doesn't know is that he has to take Jamika's friend Bebe's kids LaShawn, Kahill, and Pee-Wee which these kids are uncontrollably rambunctionous. —Corey Semple <HilaryDuff205@hotmail.com> In the first made-for-black-people animated film, bachelor Robin Harris falls head over heels for Jamika who has a son, Leon. The following weekend, Robin brings Jamika, Leon, and Jamika's friend Bebe's three rude, crude, and obnoxious kids to Fun World. Chaos ensues when Bebe's kids! enter the theme park with adventures including being chased by a group of government agents, destroying the Titanic, and being on trial. Meanwhile, while Robin and Jamika are getting together, Robin's ex-wife Dorothea is attempting to ruin their relationship. —Alex Madison <MichaelJacksonLover>

Several shady and shallow people try to profit, one after the other, from a physically deformed teenager whose face looks like a snout of a rodent and who lives hidden in a city garbage dump, alone and miserable. A physically deformed and somewhat feral teenager whose face looks like the snout of a rodent lives in solitude and misery in a city dump. Two rednecks come across his lair and kidnap him. They inform the papers about their find in case someone might want to see or interview the "Ratboy". Only Nikki, a middle-aged fired window dresser pretending to be a reporter shows up. She wants to profit off of the child as well, so she calls the cops who arrest the rednecks and she takes the child with her to her flat. She and her two dummy brothers try to think of a way to profit on the boy, but he tends to get easily agitated and depressed and no one wants anything to do with him except possibly hurt him emotionally or even physically. —Anonymous