Roddy McDowall

The initial scenes establish that Joanna Stayton (Goldie Hawn), is a spoiled brat who always gets her way, the ultimate rich bitch, and the pampered wife of pretentious socialite Grant Stayton III (Edward Herrmann). Using Roman numerals after your name is Hollywood shorthand for "pretentious snob", and Grant is that, and self centered to boot, however, Joanna is far worse. She is not only snobbish but also idle, pampered, sharp-tongued, impossible to please and unfailingly rude to anyone she considers her social inferior, which is virtually all of the human race. To describe Joanna as unsympathetic is a huge understatement, a better description would be "prize bitch". When Grant's luxury yacht develops engine trouble, Grant is forced to put into the small Oregon coastal town of Elk Snout for repairs. While the huge yacht is in port, Joanna hires Dean Proffitt (Kurt Russell), a poor carpenter who has just moved to Oregon, to build better shoe storage for her closet in the yacht. Dean is a skilled craftsman, rather picky about what he uses, such as the wood that should be used to protect the leather from salt spray in a ship. Joanna is also not impressed by his taking so long, as he designed intricate shelves that confuse and annoy her. An early funny scene in the movie has Joanna lecturing Andrew the butler (Roddy McDowall), on why the caviar he had just delivered her was no good, while Dean, standing in the background, has his tape measure pointing suggestively skyward. When the work is complete she refuses to pay him in a dispute over the quality of his workmanship, claiming that the closet is not up to her standards. In the ensuing argument Joanna loses her temper, pushes Dean overboard and throws his tools after him. The yacht crew has long ago gotten used to keep quiet and accept the guff from Joanna and Grant, despite that they have been treated like dirt, particularly family butler Andrew. After a typically stormy dinner that night, Joanna drops her wedding ring behind a seat on the deck. In reaching for it she loses her balance and falls overboard. A garbage boat rescues her but there is a problem: she is suffering from amnesia and cannot remember anything of her former identity. This we learn as Joanna is interviewed as she is wheeled into a psychiatric hospital. The following morning Grant returns to port, and finds Joanna is safe in a hospital but she has lost her memory, while her personality remains as nasty as ever. Grant, who is weary of Joanna, pretends that he does not recognize her, seeing his chance to be rid of her and to lead a playboy bachelor lifestyle on the yacht. When news of the unidentified amnesiac is televised throughout the city, a still angry Dean recognizes her picture and believes his opportunity for revenge has come. In a stroke of retributive genius, Dean shows up at the hospital audaciously posing as her husband and identifies Joanna as his wife "Annie". He tells her that she's his wife and the mother of his four unruly boys. His motive is not only payback for the way in which Joanna treated him but also his need for someone to do all the housework, as Dean is skilled as a craftsman but less accomplished in parenting and housekeeping. He is a widower with four young sons and finds it difficult to cope. The kids have missed a woman's touch in their home for nearly five years since their Mom died. Since the death of their mother his attitude towards his children and his household has been one of benign neglect. The boys have become undisciplined and badly behaved and the house looks like a war zone. Dean's intention is to get compensation for his unpaid work from Joanna being the household maid for a while. He figures on crediting her for 25 dollars a day. He assumes she'll be good for cleaning up around the house and looking after his four sons. The sons agree to the hoax, so Dean brings Joanna into his highly unkempt home and gets her to do all the chores. Although Joanna cannot recall her previous life with Grant, she is not convinced that she really is Dean's wife, especially as she turns out to be totally unskilled at cleaning and cooking. There isn't any sexual attraction on either side, so she sleeps on the couch in the living room and he keeps his bed. She asks Dean questions like where did we meet, what jobs did I have, and his answers are pretty low class redneck, so the muses to herself, I was a short, fat, slut? Whatever her questions, Dean manages a cover up with some silly story. When she gets curious about why there aren't any pictures of her anywhere, Dean arranges for one of his buddies to modify Deans original wedding pictures by inserting Joannas face replacing his first wife. Later on, when Joanna discovers that she is fluent in French, Dean has to make up a tall tale to explain why. Joanna, finally believing she is Annie, struggles to become a good housewife and mother. She accepts her role as the woman of the house. Gradually, however, she gets used to her situation, she gets good at it, Dean even begins to fall in love, as Joanna's hidden talents come out. While overwhelmed at first by having to do unfamiliar work, including cooking, while struggling to remember this family, Joanna slowly works things out. Joanna brings some discipline back into the lives of father and sons. She is able to moderate the wild, "bachelor's hall" lifestyle that Dean has set up for himself and his sons. The boys accept a curtailment of their freedom, which at first they resent but slowly appreciate. A breakthrough with the kids comes when she sticks up for them against a bullying school teacher. A breakthrough with Dean comes when she finds he is earning extra money at a menial moonlighting job on a night that he says he goes out bowling with the guys. Joanna gradually comes to appreciate Dean's good qualities and to sympathize with little people she had previously dismissed as worthless. Dean finds he's got a dilemma to solve, as he too begins to appreciate her. He first feels he truly cares for her when she gets a poison ivy rash and he does everything a loving husband would do to make his wife feel better. She is crucial help to him in landing a construction job for a miniature golf park, she suggests a theme of famous world landmarks, and prepares sketches that sell the concept to the investors. He's missed having a female companion with intelligence. He decides to tell her the truth, but he doesn't get his confession out fast enough, she jumps the gun to tell him she knows the secret. So once again he lies, he apologizes for forgetting her birthday instead, and takes her out on a fun birthday date with lots of music and singing. As they come back home that night, Joanna realizes she is truly happy with him, and they have their first passionate all night encounter as part of the birthday celebration. Of course the situation remains tricky, since it is endangered if Joanna recovers her memories. Meantime, Joanna's mother Edith (Katherine Helmond) has been hounding Grant on why she has not heard in weeks from her daughter, makes credible threats to hire mercenaries to track him down, and flies out to stay at the yacht. Under Edith's pressure, Grant reluctantly decides to end his partying and sail from Los Angeles to Elk Snout to retrieve Joanna. He finds her easily, drives in his limousine to the house she shares with Dean, and waits. Joanna comes towards the house, sees Grant, and her memory functions well enough that she says "Hi, Grant". With that trigger, her memories rapidly return to her and she leaves Dean to rejoin Grant and her old life of material privilege on the yacht, which soon departs Elk Snout bound for New York. However, Joanna is no longer the woman she once was and she hates the wealthy snobbishness represented by Grant, Edith and the fashionable psychiatrist (Henry Alan Miller) whose advice on how to treat her daughter is constantly used by Edith. Joanna asks for beer when she is offered champagne, and she spends time in conversations with the cook, the crew, and the butler Andrew, to whom she apologizes for treating him spitefully over the past years. Andrew helps Joanna to realize that her true happiness is with Dean and his sons, who she has been missing since the yacht left. As a result, she commands the skipper to turn back toward Elk Snout. The film is clearly intended as a satire on the ways of the ultra-rich. There is a sharp contrast between Joanna's idle, pointless existence before her transformation and her fulfilling, useful life as a blue collar housewife after it. Next morning, when Grant sees which way the yacht is heading, he confronts Joanna, who tells him that she doesn't love him anymore. Grant makes a subsequent remark that leads Joanna to deduce that Grant knew where she was all along, and had abandoned her in the hospital. Meantime, Dean and his kids are unhappy at doing nothing to get her back, and decide together to give it their all in one last grand effort. They pull some favors from buddies and get a Coast Guard boat to chase after the yacht, as long as there isn't any actual call for the Coast Guard boat to chase anyone else. As the two vessels approach, Joanna and Dean see each other. The Coast Guard boat then receives an emergency call after some salmon poachers are sighted, and on the yacht Grant, who has become insane after finding out that Joanna doesn't love him, fights for control of the bridge, overpowering both the skipper and Andrew, and the boats start to veer away from each other. Dean grabs a life jacket and jumps off the Coast Guard ship, compelling it under naval protocol to circle back and pick up the man overboard. Joanna tries to jump off her yacht, but Andrew holds her back, telling her that he cannot possibly allow her to do it ... without a life jacket. She takes the jacket Andrew gives to her, jumps off the yacht and asks him to tell Edith that she will call her later, before swimming towards Dean. Now suffering a mental breakdown, Grant furiously aims a bow and arrow towards Joanna, but Andrew saves Joanna's life by kicking Grant into the water, then gives him two weeks' notice. Needless to say, there are hugs and kisses and reunions all around. Joanna leaves Grant, and begins a happy life with Dean and the boys, only instead of Dean's shack, they are now on the yacht, after Joanna finds out and tells Dean that all of the money and the yacht actually belong to her and not Grant. In the last scene, the boys eagerly start to make out their Christmas lists, with one of them asking for the spelling of Porsche. Dean asks Joanna "What can I give you? You already have everything!". Joanna smiles as she replies "You could give me a little girl". They kiss each other as the boat sails into the sunset.

Charley Brewster is a normal, average teenager living with his divorced mother in a unnamed suburban township. One evening, Charley looks out his window and sees his new neighbors moving in the next door and appear to be carrying what looks like a coffin. Intrigued with his new neighbors, Charley begins to spy on them. One day, a young woman (obivously a call girl) shows up at Charley's house by accident looking for another address and Charley directs her to the house next door. The next morning at school, Charley sees a news broadcast about the police finding "another murder victim" from an unknown serial killer who decapitates female victims and drains the bodies of blood. Another evening later, Charley, suspecting something sinister about his new neighbors, spies on the house next door and sees Jerry Dandridge biting the neck of another woman. He tells his mother what he saw, but she passes it off as Charley's imagination. Charley tries to tell his friend "Evil Ed", and girlfriend Amy Peterson, but neither of them believe him, and begin to worry about Charley's mental well being. Another day later, Charley calls the police with information about one of the murder victims and a detective accompanies him to the house where they meet Billy Cole, Jerry Dandridge's roommate who lets them in and shows them around the house. Finding nothing, the detective decides to leave, but Charley tells him to check the basement, which Billy seem adamant about letting them go down there. The detective forces Charley to leave with him and tells him not to ever call him again, thinking that Charley has an overactive imagination. Suspecting that Jerry Dandridge is a vampire, he seeks advice from Evil Ed about how to fight vampires. Evil Ed tells him, from watching movies and documentaries about suspected vampires, that vampires are super strong, have no heartbeat or pulse, have vulnerabilities to holy water and crosses. They also cast no reflection in a mirror and they and can only be killed by fire, decapitation, sunlight, or a wooden stake through the heart. Ed also tells Charley that a vampire cannot enter a person's home without an invitation. Charley goes home, but finds Jerry Dandridge in his living room waiting for him... having been invited in by Charley's mother. Dandridge is seemingly friendly and tells Mrs. Brewster about Charley showing up at his house today, and she reprimands Charley not to do it again. That evening, Charley begins to fortify the house, knowing that Dandridge can enter whenever he feels like it. However, Dandridge enters the house from a second floor window and hides in a closet in Charley's bedroom. When Charley gets ready for bed, Dandridge surprises him and threatens to kill him for snooping around and nearly revealing his secret that he indeed is a vampire. When Dandridge tries to choke Charley to death, he stabs the vampire in his right hand with a pencil. Wounded and angry, Jerry Dandridge terrorizes Charley by revealing his true vampire demonic image, complete with red eyes, fangs, claws, and a roaring with a wolf-like rage, but waking up Charley's mother. Dandridge flees and threatens to kill Charley tomorrow night. The next morning, Charley then seeks out help of favorite vampire killer, Peter Vincent, a former actor who hosts TV segments of horror movies that Charley watches and who claims to be a real vampire hunter. Charley confronts Vincent at the studio where he works and tells him that his neighbor is a vampire and is going to kill him. Vincent, like everyone else, brushes off Charley's claims as an overeager teen with an overactive imagination. Charley does not go to school that day (because he finds his car totaled after Dandridge apparently trashed it the other night after their confrontation). Evil Ed and Amy visit Charley at his house and find him secluded in his bedroom with crosses hanging everywhere. Hearing him talk about Peter Vincent, Evil Ed and Amy visit him at his apartment where they tell him about their friend and persuade him to prove to him that vampires don't exist. Vincent calls Dandridge at his house and offers to come over the next night with Charley to debunk Charley's theory that he is a vampire. The following evening, Vincent, Charley, Ed, and Amy pay a visit to Dandridge's house where Billy lets them in and introduces them to Jerry Dandridge. Vincent tries to show Charley that Danridge is not a vampire by having him drink a vital of holy water. Charley is still not convinced and says the holy water that Dandridge just drank isn't real holy water. However, after Vincent sees Jerry casts no reflection in his small compact mirror he gets scared, and gathers up Amy, Charley, and Ed, and they all leave. Mr. Vincent hurries to his car, and then he drives away fast. Dandridge finds the mirror dropped by Vincent on his way out and leaves as well. As Charley, Amy and Ed walk away, Evil Ed decides to leave Charley and Amy by walking in a dark alley. He runs down an alley, and it gets darker. All the sudden Jerry Dandridge appears, who wants Ed to become a vampire. At Peter Vincent's apartment, he huddles scared and tries to shake it off, from feeling scared. Just then Evil Ed knocks on Peter Vincent's door. Vincent opens it, and begins conversing to Evil Ed casually, as he knows nothing of the hideous, undead Evil Ed is now. Suddenly Evil Ed attacks Mr. Vincent, who places a cross upon Evil Ed's forehead, which burns him. A scalded Evil Ed slinks away, threatening Mr. Vincent by telling his "Master". Charley and Amy find Dandridge following them and he chases them to a local nightclub where Dandridge sees that Amy resembles his lost love. He uses his vampire charm to hypnotize her and dance with him. When Charley intervenes, Dandridge restrains him and two bouncers appear. Danridge morphs into his fanged, red-eyed vampire form and kills both bouncers with his superhuman strength. Dandridge escapes from the nightclub in the confusion and chaos with Amy, and he and tells Charley to meet him later at his house or he will kill her. Charley runs back to Mr. Vincent, who makes him grab a cross before he enters his apartment. Charley persuades Peter Vincent that they must confront Dandridge and kill him before the night is over. The duo get ready, and go to Jerry's house. By then, he has already turned Amy into a half-vampire. As Charley and Vincent enter the house, Dandridge appears on the top of the stairs and says: "Welcome to Fright Night... for real." Vincent hold up a cross but with no faith behind it, can't stop Dandridge from advancing. Charley has faith and the vampire covers in fear from his crucifix. But Billy Cole comes to his master's aid and knocks Charley off the staircase, rendering him unconscious. Vincent panics and runs to Charley's house. Charley wakes up to find himself locked in a room with Amy (who is now a half-vampire). Dandridge leaves a stake for Charley, giving him a choice:to kill Amy or not and risk getting killed by her when she fully turns in the morning. Vincent flees to Charley's house to hide out, only to be confronted by Evil Ed, who transforms himself into a wolf and attacks Vincent again. Vincent defends himself by breaking a wooden table leg and kills Evil Ed by stabbing him through the heart, who then morphs back into his human form as he dies. Vincent then returns to the Dandridge house where he frees Charley and they confront Billy again. Vincent shoots him several times with a gun, but Billy (a sort of zombie-like slave/familiar) keeps advancing towards them, and Charley finally kills him with Vincent's wooden stake by stabbing him through the heart in which Billy melts into a gooey mess of blood and green slime. Charley and Vincent have another confrontation with Dandridge, who is kept at bay with their crucifixes, and they see that dawn is approaching. Dandridge transforms himself into a bat and flies away. Charley and Vincent venture down to the basement to find Dandridge's coffin to kill him while he sleeps. Just when they find the coffin, Amy, now a fully turned vampire, enters and attacks them. While Charley tries to keep her away, Vincent manages to open Jerry Dandridge's coffin and tries to drive his wooden stake through his heart, but Dandridge wakes up and Vincent stabs him, but misses his heard. The vampire rises from his coffin and pulls out the wooden stake. But when he attacks Vincent, Charley begins smashing in all the basement windows, allowing the sunlight to hit Dandridge. Using a mirror, they reflect the sunlight and finally manage to kill Dandridge by blasting him with the rays and he bursts into flames and within seconds his body is reduced to dust and bones. With Jerry Dandridge's death, the still-alive Amy is apparently released from his curse and becomes human once again. In the final scene, the movie ends just where it began with Charley and Amy back in his room watching Peter Vincent's show on TV, who announces his movie that evening will be about aliens, not vampires, and winks to Charley. The movie is left open ended, when Charley looks out at the Dandridge house next door, now dark and vacant and sees lights like eyes that go away. He then goes back to her for another make-out session on his bed. The voice of Evil Ed is heard saying "oh you're so cool Brewster!"

The Belgian detective Hercule Poirot travels to what appears to be an idyllic vacation island in the Adriatic Sea. The Evil exists anywhere.... even in paradise islands. A former actress (Arlena Marshall), who alienates everyone around her, is found strangled on the beach. Everyone in the resort had a motive to kill Arlena, but all seemingly have an alibi. Poirot will investigate the murder. Poirot discovers that the murderer is Patrick Redfern, Arlena's lover, who had been having an affair with Arlena while seemingly flaunting it in his wife's face. He wanted to steal back a diamond he had given her, which had itself been stolen before Arlena came into possession of it. It turns out that not only did Patrick's wife approve of the affair, but was in cahoots with her husband. An elaborate ruse had been set up to throw Poirot off the track with Patrick's wife temporarily impersonating Arlena after Arlena had been killed. The murder turns out to be linked to a previous murder case, in which it was assumed that a vagrant had committed the crime.

Story of singer Fanny Brice's stormy relationship with showman Billy Rose. The continuing story of Fanny Brice following that depicted in Funny Girl (1968) is presented. An established star on Broadway as a headliner for the Ziegfeld Follies, Fanny and the rest of the world are hitting difficult times entering into the 1930s. Her marriage to Nicky Arnstein, who she still loves is ending in divorce, and even Florenz Ziegfeld Jr. is having trouble coming up with money to continue to produce the Follies. Along comes brash nightclub owner, song lyricist and wannabe impresario Billy Rose, who says he can raise the money and has the material to produce his own revue, which he wants to star Fanny. Fanny is both attracted to and repelled by Billy because of his chutzpah, his stubbornness and knowing that underneath his outer veneer is the soul of a true hustler... much like she was when she was first starting out and much like she still is now. Through their professional trials and tribulations, they slowly start to fall for each other. But Fanny admits that Nicky is still never far from her mind... —Huggo

Following a North American pandemic from a space-borne disease that wiped out all dogs and cats in 1983, the government has become a series of Schutzstaffel-patterned police states that took chimpanzees, gorillas, and orangutans as pets before establishing a culture based on ape slave labor. These events were foretold in 1973 as testimony by two chimpanzee scientists who came from the distant future, Cornelius and Zira, before they were killed. Widely believed to be dead, their baby was secretly raised by the circus owner Armando as a young horseback rider. In 1991, now fully grown and named Caesar, the ape is brought to one of the cities to distribute flyers for Armando's circus. During their trip, Armando advises Caesar not to speak in public for fear of his life. After seeing a gorilla being beaten and drugged, Caesar shouts "Lousy human bastards!". Armando attempts to defuse the ensuing commotion by taking responsibility for the exclamation. He plans to turn himself in to the authorities and bluff his way out while instructing Caesar to hide among the apes for safety. Caesar obeys and hides in a cage of orangutans, finding himself being trained for slavery through violent conditioning. He is then sold at auction to Governor Breck. Caesar is then put to work by Breck's chief aide MacDonald, whose African American heritage allows him to sympathize with the apes to the disgust of his boss. Meanwhile, Armando is interrogated by Inspector Kolp, who suspects his "circus ape" is the child of Cornelius and Zira. Kolp's assistant puts Armando under a machine that psychologically forces people to be truthful. Realizing he cannot fight the machine, Armando jumps through a window and dies. When Caesar learns of Armando's death, he loses faith in human kindness. In secret, he begins teaching the apes combat and has them gather weapons. Unfortunately, Breck eventually learns that Caesar is the ape the police are hunting. Meanwhile, Caesar realizes MacDonald is an ally to the apes' cause and reveals himself to him. MacDonald understands Caesar's intent to depose Breck, but expresses his doubts about the revolution's effectiveness. Caesar is later captured by Breck's men and is electrically tortured into speaking. Hearing him speak, Breck orders Caesar to be killed. With MacDonald's help, the heroes manage to trick Breck into believing Caesar died. Once Breck leaves, Caesar kills his torturer and escapes. To build his numbers, Caesar takes over Ape Management. While setting the city on fire, Caesar and the rest of the apes proceed to the command center, killing most of the riot police that attempt to stop them in the process. After succeeding in this, Caesar has Breck marched out to be executed. MacDonald pleads with Caesar not to succumb to brutality and be merciful to the former masters. Caesar ignores him, deciding to dedicate his life to man's downfall. This is the original uncut ending of the movie. After a bad reception from the first audiences due to its dark tone, the ending was reworked to add a dubbed follow-up to the speech from Caesar: As the apes raise their rifles to beat Breck to death, Caesar's girlfriend Lisa voices her objection, saying "No!". She is the first ape to speak other than Caesar, but the other apes are concerned about Caesar's bloodlust as well. Caesar reconsiders and orders the apes to lower their weapons, deciding that they can afford to be humane, since the fight is already won and they "have seen the birth of the planet of the apes".

A marine scientist volunteers to have his family live in a prototype underwater home to prove it's practical. Marine scientist Fred Miller designs the world's first underwater home, but when the business magnate funding his work threatens to end the project, Miller volunteers to live in it with his own family to prove it's practical. The underwater clan includes his water-phobic wife and his daughter and son, who are part of a rock and roll band. They bring along the lead singer and drummer. Along the way, they have to contend with a competing engineer who promises to mine the ocean floor for the businessman. A record producer likes their music and books them on TV, leading the kids to try to escape to the surface.

The players in an ongoing poker game are being mysteriously killed off, one by one. After a card shark is caught cheating, he is taken out and lynched by the drunkards he was playing against. Soon afterwards, the men who were in the lynch mob start being murdered, one after another; all by hanging, strangling, or smothering. Who will be killed next and who is responsible? Is it one of the original party seeking to cover their accursed deed, or perhaps the mysterious Rev. Jonathan Rudd, who has recently arrived in town?