Sam Lerner

Santa helps a gangster Bhavani's sister elope with her lover enraging him and unknowingly falls in love with Bhavani's younger sister.

12-year-old DJ Walters (Mitchel Musso) spies on his elderly neighbor, Mr. Nebbercracker (Steve Buscemi), who confiscates any item landing in his yard. Nebbercracker is harsh on kids who land on his lawn even accidentally. He yells at them, confiscates their toys or bikes and chases them off his lawn and away from his old and scary looking house. DJ keeps detailed logs of all incidents at Nebbercracker's house. DJ believes that there is something wrong with Nebbercracker's house, but even his own parents do not believe him. DJ's parents leave town for the weekend for a dentists' convention, leaving him in the care of Elizabeth "Zee" (aggie Gyllenhaal), their babysitter. Charles "Chowder" (Sam Lerner), DJ's best friend comes by to spend time with him. Chowder loses his basketball on Nebbercracker's lawn. Chowder begs DJ to retrieve the ball, as it cost $28, which Chowder had to earn by doing household chores for multiple weeks. DJ is caught by Nebbercracker while recovering it, who rages at him before apparently suffering a heart attack and being taken away by an ambulance. As soon as Nebbercracker goes down, the heater of the house comes alive and starts spewing smoke through the chimney. DJ finds a key lying on the lawn and keeps it. Zee invites her boyfriend to spend time with at DJ's house and is not at all interested in taking care of DJ. That night, DJ receives phone calls from Nebbercracker's house with no one on the other end. He calls back the number and can hear ringing noises coming from Nebbercracker's house. DJ can see movement in the Nebbercracker house, even though nobody is supposed to be home. DJ eavesdrops on Zee's boyfriend Bones (Jason Lee), who tells Zee about losing his kite on Nebbercracker's lawn when he was younger, and that Nebbercracker supposedly ate his wife. Zee kicks Bones out of the house for being a nuisance and he goes to the Nebbercracker's front lawn. As he uproots the grass, Bones sees his kite in the doorway of Mr. Nebbercracker's house. But he and the kite are consumed by the house as he is retrieving it. DJ runs over to inform Chowder that Nebbercracker is back and Bones's blood is on his hands. Chowder is at a construction site where a large crane has been left unattended, with ignition keys plugged in. Chowder is dismissive of DJ's claims and to calm him down, he offers to approach the Nebbercracker house himself. Chowder is attacked by the house when he rings the bell and manages to escape as the reach of the house does not extend beyond the front lawn. Chowder now believes DJ. The next morning, Jenny Bennett (Spencer Locke) is selling Halloween chocolates to all houses in the neighborhood. DJ and Chowder see her going to Nebbercracker's house, and they rush out to warn her, catching her before she is eaten by the house. Jenny then calls Chowder and DJ, and calls the police, but officers Landers (Kevin James) and Lester (Nick Cannon) do not believe their story. The trio seek advice from Reginald "Skull" Skulinski (Jon Heder), who is claimed to be an expert on the supernatural. They learn that the house is a "Domus Mactabilis" (Latin for "deadly home"); a being created when a human soul merges with a structure. They assume the house is inhabited by Nebbercracker's soul. The only way to kill the house is to destroy its heart, its source of life. They conclude that the heart must be the fireplace, as DJ realizes that the chimney has been smoking since Nebbercracker died. Chowder provides a cold medicine-filled dummy that should cause the house to sleep long enough for them to douse the furnace. Officers Landers and Lester thwart their plan (when they pass through the neighborhood on a drive by), and they are arrested when Landers finds the cold medicine, stolen from Chowder's father's pharmacy, inside the dummy. The cops place the trio in their car while they examine the house. The house eats Landers, Lester and the car. DJ, Chowder and Jenny escape the car but are trapped in the house. The house falls asleep (as the dummy was also with the cops when they were eaten by the house), and they begin exploring. They fall into the basement and find a collection of toys accumulated from Nebbercracker's lawn, as well as a cage containing the body of Constance the Giantess (Kathleen Turner), Nebbercracker's wife, encased in cement. The house realizes they are inside and attacks them. DJ, Chowder and Jenny force the house to vomit them outside by grabbing its uvula. Nebbercracker arrives home alive, revealing that the house is possessed by Constance. As a young man Nebbercracker met Constance, who was an unwilling member of a circus sideshow, and fell in love with her despite her obesity. After helping her escape, she and Nebbercracker began building the house. One Halloween, as children tormented her, Constance tried hurting them with an ax, but lost her footing and died in the foundations of the house; the cement buried her body. Nebbercracker finished the house after Constance's death, knowing it was what she would have wanted. Aware that Constance's spirit made the house come alive, Nebbercracker tried keeping people away by pretending to hate children. DJ tells Nebbercracker it is time to let Constance go, but she overhears. The house breaks free from its foundation and chases the group to a construction site. Nebbercracker attempts to convince Constance that she should die while holding a stick of dynamite, but Constance refuses. As she tries to eat him, Chowder fights the house off with a back hoe, causing it to fall into a pit. DJ is given the dynamite, and he and Jenny climb to the top of a crane while Chowder distracts Constance. DJ throws the dynamite into the chimney, destroying the house. The trio see Nebbercracker with Constance's spirit for the last time before she fades away. DJ apologizes to Nebbercracker for the loss of his house and wife, but Nebbercracker thanks DJ and the kids for freeing him and Constance. That night, children in their Halloween costumes are lined up at the site of Nebbercracker's house, where DJ, Chowder and Jenny help him return the toys to their owners. Jenny's parents pick her up and DJ and Chowder go trick-or-treating, which they previously thought they were too old for. Those who were eaten by the house emerge from the basement.

Tim Dingman (Ben Stiller) and Nick Vanderpark (Jack Black) are best friends, neighbors and co-workers at 3M. Tim has been recently promoted at work, while Nick has received a performance evaluation which says that he is not focused enough on work. Due to his promotion, Tim has received a new fancy chair, which has excellent lumbar support. Nick is constantly coming up with crazy ideas to get rich quick. Tim is the voice of reason and tells Nick all the reasons why his crazy invention ideas are not practical and would not work. One day, while returning from work, Nick observes a dog owner having to clean after his dog. Nick thinks about inventing a canned spray to make dog turds disappear. Nick works with a research scientist Dimitriov to create a working prototype of his product. Tim is skeptical since he cannot understand how the product works and where does the feces disappear to. Nick asks Tim to go 50/50 for the next stage of the invention, which requires an investment of $4000. Tim's wife Debbie was excited about the idea and wanted to invest, but Tim says that matter cannot simply disappear. Soon, Nick performs a demonstration of the product, and it works just as intended. Tim is dumbfounded. 18 months later, Nick has invented Vapoorize, a spray that instantly removes dog feces, and he actually succeeds. Nick is now selling the product on live TV. He now lives in a huge mansion (right in front of Tim, where his old house used to be) with his family. Nick even has a horse named Corkey, who always comes to Tim's yard to eat his apples. As Nick's wealth continues to grow, so does Tim's envy, as he had initially scoffed at the idea and squandered an opportunity to invest and become mega-rich himself. Nick is blissfully unaware of Tim's jealousy, and his generosity only serves to make Tim more envious of him. Tim is increasingly self-conscious and goes into a tirade when any of his kids (Mike or Lula) question him about their relative lack of wealth as compared to Nick's family. Nick no longer has to work and spends all the time with his family. Meanwhile Nick's wife Natalie (Amy Poehler) decides to run for state senate but is continually plagued by questions about her husband's product. Natalie has decided to make environment as her main campaign platform. The people want to know where the dog turd goes to. Tim's wife Debbie (Rachel Weisz) and children temporarily leave (as Debbie cannot stand to look at Tim), and he is fired from 3M (as his focus has nosedived recently), after Tim's jealousy reaches new levels and he has angry tirade at his boss when questioned about his lack of focus. Tim also has to cancel the pool as he now has no money to pay the contractors (who had already dug a hole in Tim's backyard). Meanwhile Nick has just acquired a new Vineyard. To drown his sorrows, Tim goes to a bar for the first time in his life. In a bar he meets J-Man (Christopher Walken), a bizarre drifter, who lends a sympathetic ear and offers advice. J-Man tells Tim to shake things up with Tim and sends him home in a taxi. After a drunken night out, Tim believes that he accidentally kills Nick's beloved horse, Corkey. Tim was shooting arrows, and he suddenly finds Corkey dead in his backyard with an arrow stuck in his body. Tim buries the horse in his abandoned swimming pool. J-Man comes by to return Tim's car. The same morning, Debbie returns home with the kids and is determined to focus on what she has with Tim. Nick offers a $50,000 reward for the return of his horse. J-Man and Tim concoct a plan whereby J-Man would discover the dead horse and claim the reward, splitting the proceeds. J-Man decides to move the horse to a different location while Tim is enjoying a family vacation with his family at J-Man's cabin by the lake. The endeavor is hit by a series of unfortunate events, including the sequestering of Tim's family in J-Man's mountain cabin. The car could not drive up to the cabin and the family had to hike through a mountain to get there, only to find that it wasn't very nice to begin with. Then Tim is called back to the house by J-Man to help with putting the horse on the flatbed of J-Man's truck. But J-Man's truck is too high, so they load the horse on the top of Tim's mini-van. J-Man makes him drive way out of town to make sure that the horse is not discovered by anyone else and it starts raining. This leads to the horse's carcass being lost in a rainstorm. Nick reveals to Tim that he is going to Rome for the debut of Vapoorize there and gives Tim the opportunity to join him in a 50:50 partnership, which he accepts. J-Man finds out that Tim is now rich, and, feeling betrayed, tries to blackmail him. After confessing to his wife, now enjoying her rich lifestyle, Tim agrees to pay J-Man; however, J-Man ups his demands and asks to be Tim's partner. Tim accidentally shoots him in the back with an arrow and J-Man, believing that Tim has tried to kill him, backs down in fear. Tim eventually confesses all to Nick who forgives him for his jealousy and agrees to continue with the partnership. However, at a press conference for Debbie's electoral campaign (where she promises to withdraw her candidacy if it is proven Vapoorize is harmful to the environment in any way), Corkey's body is seen floating down the nearby river, and the animal's Post-Mortem discovers that the horse was not killed by the arrow as previously thought but actually poisoned by a by-product of Vapoorize, used by Tim to treat his garden after Corkey came to eat the apples off of his tree. The veterinarian informs the pair that she is obliged to inform the Environmental Protection Agency, and Vapoorize is immediately pulled from the market. Nick and Tim almost lose all their wealth and glory-until Tim comes up with an invention of his own: Pocket Flan, inspired by Nick and his family's love for the dessert. J-Man is shown in the audience of Tim and Nick's infomercial for Pocket Flan, apparently reconciled.